Result: I feel really awful right now. I feel frustrated, annoyed, regretful, stupid, used, rude and just downright bad about myself. Every question I ask has an obvious answer, every time I speak I'm babbling, every idea I have is lame. What I want to do isn't good enough. When I just appease I'm annoying and complacent. The things I'm proud of are just alright. Every opinion I have is wrong. Every time I express issue with how I perceive how I'm being treated I feel like beleaguering oversensitive girl.
Intent: Definitely (hopefully) not that.
Who's to blame?
I'm a good person. I'm a caring person. I'm intelligent, I'm helpful, I'm interested. I don't want to put anyone out. But somehow, I seem to induce the same problems I'm trying to avoid. I should know better.
Anyway: on to a few days in Florida. I can relax after I finish this paper, go to the pool, read for pleasure, get a grip. Get some rest.
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